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Oct. 21st, 2021 08:20 pmFor the first time in Darrow, Vanya needs to get away.
In their very special, fucked up way, her family is perfect. Seven precious gems forged in pressure and darkness. Sorry - five. Diego's never been here and Ben is gone. She has no remaining brainpower to process the grief of missing Diego. There's too much that's happened without him and not enough pleasant history to hang onto. She loves him, she would be ecstatic to see him, but she can't seem to miss him the way she feels like she should. Not like she misses Ben. And now Allison.
Hargreeves House feels more like it is home to a ghost than when it was. They're down two bodies now, and the halls feel nauseatingly spacious, like the sprawling walls of the Academy - the ones Vanya brought down without a second thought. It's a dangerous association, but she's been lucky. So far the worst of her grief has manifested as nothing more than a day of unseasonable, pouring rain. That is not an accident. Vanya keeps herself firmly in check, sacrificing sleep and sometimes human contact altogether to reduce the risk of an Incident. She's bereft of both, but only because she can't bring herself to be without people right now, and she can't keep crawling into her siblings' beds in hopes of finding sleep and expecting them to tolerate it. Especially when she wakes up feeling like she is about to scream. Like tonight.
It's late when she decides to abandon pursuing sleep, but she knows someone who is usually around late. He may even be out and about - a thing that would lessen that pang of guilt from bothering someone so late. Not that she bothers him, he says. She even believes him.
Hey, where are you?, she texts him before layering up: hoodie first, then coat. If Sam isn't up and around, she'll just walk. She can't be here tonight. It feels too much like what they left behind.
In their very special, fucked up way, her family is perfect. Seven precious gems forged in pressure and darkness. Sorry - five. Diego's never been here and Ben is gone. She has no remaining brainpower to process the grief of missing Diego. There's too much that's happened without him and not enough pleasant history to hang onto. She loves him, she would be ecstatic to see him, but she can't seem to miss him the way she feels like she should. Not like she misses Ben. And now Allison.
Hargreeves House feels more like it is home to a ghost than when it was. They're down two bodies now, and the halls feel nauseatingly spacious, like the sprawling walls of the Academy - the ones Vanya brought down without a second thought. It's a dangerous association, but she's been lucky. So far the worst of her grief has manifested as nothing more than a day of unseasonable, pouring rain. That is not an accident. Vanya keeps herself firmly in check, sacrificing sleep and sometimes human contact altogether to reduce the risk of an Incident. She's bereft of both, but only because she can't bring herself to be without people right now, and she can't keep crawling into her siblings' beds in hopes of finding sleep and expecting them to tolerate it. Especially when she wakes up feeling like she is about to scream. Like tonight.
It's late when she decides to abandon pursuing sleep, but she knows someone who is usually around late. He may even be out and about - a thing that would lessen that pang of guilt from bothering someone so late. Not that she bothers him, he says. She even believes him.
Hey, where are you?, she texts him before layering up: hoodie first, then coat. If Sam isn't up and around, she'll just walk. She can't be here tonight. It feels too much like what they left behind.
